Roddy Piper’s Piping: Three Wise Guys

I didn’t think I would get around to reviewing any holiday films starring wrestlers this holiday season but I managed to change that last night. I’ve had my copy of Three Wise Guys for quite some time but never got around to  it.

Three Wise Guys poster


Three Wise Guys is about three hired men who work for a crooked casino owner, Murray Crown, played by Tom Arnold (Roseanne). They are hired to find a guy named Jake Marley who has information that could ruin his business. The Three Wise Guys are played by Eddie McClintock (Warehouse 13), Judd Nelson (The Breakfast Club, and Nicholas Turturro (The Longest Yard). They happen to run across a young lady named Mary Ann Davidson, who is pregnant. She robs them after they help her. Turns out Murray also wants her to be found as well, as she is supposedly pregnant with his child. This leads to the wise guys searching for Mary and her child much like the nativity story of the bible. Three Wise Guys also stars the late “Rowdy” Roddy Piper (WWE, WCW) as Pastor Roberts, who along with his wife gives shelter to Mary. He is charming in this part, it may be a small role but I really do enjoy Piper’s bit parts in films. He was quite an actor and I am always amazed at his ability to bring characters to life. Any chance I get to watch a performance of his is sure to be a highlight of my day. This film is a nice little made for TV movie; it’s a mostly family friendly affair, albeit it does have some violence. I found it be an extremely charming holiday film. It largely takes place in the desert as it takes place in the areas surrounding Las Vegas, Nevada. I thought with the amount of star power in the film that perhaps the rest of the aspects of the film would suffer but that was not the case. If you enjoy made for TV holiday fare, you may very well enjoy Three Wise Guys. It is available to rent through Amazon Video and can be bought on DVD on Amazon and Ebay as well for cheap. I hope everyone has a happy holiday.

Three Wise GuysThree Wise Guys 2Three Wise Guys 3Three Wise Guys 4Three Wise Guys 5Three Wise Guys 6Three Wise Guys 9


I’d also like to remind everyone that I do sometimes write for B&S About Movies. I have a few recent holiday centered film reviews available there. I recently reviewed Mother Krampus 2: Slay Ride for the site and was surprised to find out that it features Benny Benzino, a retired wrestler from Ohio,  as a bouncer. I also reviewed the film Santa Jaws, featuring a Santa hat wearing killer shark from a comic book that comes to life!

Deck the Halls with Bau(tista)s of Holly: Escape Plan 2: Hades

Covering movies that star Dave Bautista this holiday season has been a fun little project. I had no idea that he had almost half a dozen films he was in released this year! I’ll be covering Escape Plan 2: Hades today but first a little blurb about Escape Plan which was released 5 years ago in 2013. Escape Plan is about a security specialist, Ray Breslin, who is incarcerated in prisons throughout the country to test if they are prone to escapes. Ray is played by Sylvester Stallone. He is hired to test the security of a black-site prison that governments disappear people to but things go wrong. It’s a fun movie and really well done. It also stars Arnold Schwarzenegger as Rottmayer, a prisoner, who helps Ray. I thought it would be odd to just cover the 2nd film without touching on the first but Escape Plan also stars Benjamin Wood as a member of Rottmayer’s gang. Benjamin wrestled in WWE’s developmental territory OVW as Outlaw Ben Woods. Escape Plan also features stunt work by professional wrestler, Luke Hawx.

Escape Plan Ben Woods.jpg

Scharwzenegger foreground. Above Schwarzengger’s right shoulder, Benjamin Wood.

Escape Plan 2

Escape Plan 2: Hades takes place in a technological marvel of a prison, Sylvester Stallone reprises his role as Ray Breslin, now head of his own security company. His team is incarcerated one by one in a strange and highly technological prison, called Hades, where prisoners are forced to fight one another for privileges. Dave Bautista plays a former associate of Ray’s named Trent DeRosa, who is a jack of all trades privy to connections with some seedy folks. He isn’t in the movie a lot but his character is someone I would like to see more of. This may happen in Escape Plan 3: Devil’s Station which will be released sometime next year. It seems that Escape Plan 2 wasn’t very well received but I enjoyed the heck out of it. It took the concepts from Escape Plan and turned the dial to max. It was very pleasing visually, the soundtrack was excellent, and the story decent. I don’t expect every movie to be a masterpiece but if it entertains me then it has accomplished what I want a movie to do and Escape Plan 2: Hades was highly entertaining. I recommend this films to all fans of movies set in prisons, fans of action, and fans of Stallone and Bautista. I’m actually kind of eager to see what they can do with the Escape Plan 3: Devil’s Station now. For two movies I knew very little about going into this week, I came out with a renewed interest for Stallone and Scharwzenegger. As for Bautista, I’ll continue to see everything I can with him in it as he is quickly becoming a favorite to watch.


Escape Plan Hades 1Escape Plan Hades 3Escape Plan Hades 4Escape Plan Hades 5Escape Plan Hades 6

I’d also like to plug some of my other writing endeavors as I write for the site B&S About Movies, a blog run by Pittsburgh wrestler, Shirley Doe (Sam Panico). Sam has become a great friend and I love messaging him about our newest film discoveries and our shared obsession with Italian director Lucio Fulci and Italian horror films in general.  This month I have a bunch of reviews up, mostly Christmas related horror film reviews but also a review of Shadow Warriors Assault on Devil’s Island, starring Hulk Hogan for lost TV week.

Deck the Halls with Bau(tista)s of Holly: Hotel Artemis

The Christmas season can be brutal but can it be as unforgivingly violent as the Clearwater Riots of 2028 as depicted by our feature today, Hotel Artemis? I certainly hope not because it was one wild night for the city of Los Angeles.


Hotel Artemis is about a hotel that caters to injured criminals, it is run by “the Nurse”, Jean Thomas, who is played by Jodie Foster and her assistant, Everest, portrayed by Dave Bautista (Batista, WWE). They are having a very busy night at the hotel with criminals of all ilks showing up. A band of thieves, led by Sherman and his brother Lev have decided to rob a high profile bank but the vault has proved to be quite a hassle. Instead of getting into the vault they take what the common household assistants have brought to stowaway for their billionaire bosses. On the way out, one of Lev steals a fancy pen, even after being told he does not want it. They attempt to escape into the riot filled streets but are met with resistance by the riot police, one is killed and three are harmed, of the four, Lev is is critically injured. Sherman makes a call to the Artemis to bring his severely hurt brother Lev there. The hotel, usually a safe house is anything but this particular night. The pen that Lev has stolen happens to belong to a crime boss, “The Wolf King” Orion Franklin, Jeff Goldblum.  Orion has a particular way of dealing with those who steal from him, drowning them in the ocean. The hotel becomes a war zone when we find out that one of the patrons of the Artemis has come to kill an important mark. To say anymore would spoil the movie. Batista is excellent as Everest, his hulking frame more suited to being a henchman than a nurse’s assistant, but he takes his profession in healthcare seriously. Everest is also the Nurse’s right hand man at the hotel; handling repairs, unruly patrons, and anything else that might need done. Among the many colorful characters that come to take shelter at the Artemis and those already occupying it, Everest, was my favorite. He is not the main focus of the film, but in my opinion is still a major character. Hotel Artemis is a stylish film, set in the near future, with stunning visuals. The plot is interesting and I felt the whole movie came together well. I wish I could spend more time in the reality the film brings to life and I would recommend it to folks who are fans of thrillers and action flicks alike.

Hotel Artemis 1

From left to right, the Nurse (Jodie Foster) and Everest (Dave Bautista)

Hotel Artemis 2Hotel Artemis 3Hotel Artemis 4Hotel Artemis 5Hotel Artemis 6

Happy Holi-Daves: Eight Legged Freaks

Of my ever growing collection of wrestlers appearing in films and TV, my small section of movies that star David Arquette are some of my favorites. He is most famously known as Deputy Dewey from the Scream franchise and for having held, albeit briefly, the WCW World Heavyweight Championship in 2000 after filming Ready to Rumble. I find it fascinating that a fan of wrestling who happened to be an actor had a very small title run. Although David Arquette wasn’t a huge fan of the idea of holding the title, I thought it was a neat legacy for him to have and without that short stint in WCW, I wouldn’t even be writing about him on this blog. More recently David Arquette has been spotlighted in the sports entertainment world, his feud with RJ City leading to a handful of appearances including a death match with Nick Gage. I thought it would be fun to cover some films from Arquette’s ever growing fimography during the holiday season.


I’ve watched a lot of movies since becoming more than just a casual film fan and not all of them turn out to be gold, however, I find it important to find some good in each movie I watch. What is the point of being a fan of films if we’re not ready to experience a film with a positive attitude and the hope to enjoy it? Granted we’re not going to love every film we see but we can at least try to find some enjoyment in everything we watch. This may seem like an out of place statement and may even come across as ranting but not everything I review here on this blog is a mega million dollar budget film and it is important I not lose sight of why I have undertaken an endeavor to see every film that stars a wrestler I can find.


Well I’m sure that’s enough proselytizing so on to the feature for today, Eight Legged Freaks. Eight Legged Freaks is about Chris McCormick, played by David Arquette, who comes back to his hometown of Prosperity, Arizona, to stop the sale of the family mine to a large chemical company that has been using the town for storage. It just so happens that the same chemical company has truck drivers hauling loads of dangerous chemical who are afraid to hit rabbits with their trucks. Upon losing control of his vehicle a driver loses a canister of toxic chemicals that falls into the nearby body of water. There is an exotic spider breeder and salesman who lives near the site of the accident who has been feeding his spiders crickets from around the water. Why he is skimming crickets, who are terrestrial insects, out of water is never explained but we don’t need explanations because this movie is B-Movie goodness through and through. The spiders, upon ingesting the crickets are growing at a rapid pace and soon become so large that they eat the arachnid collector, Joshua, played by Tom Noonan. They then skitter off into the nearby McCormick Mines. The spiders wreak havoc on the town first by eating neighborhood animals and then by attacking the townsfolk. This movie is all I could want and more when it comes to a movie about giant spiders, I’m a fan of the older monster movies with gigantic insects and the like terrorizing towns, such as Them and Empire of the Ants.


David Arquette is an excellent actor. He’s played cops, goofy teenagers obssessed with wrestling, military privates who smoke marijuana, and more throughout his 28 year career in film. His portrayal of Chris in this movie is quite enjoyable being an average Joe who encounters an extraordinary circumstance, giant spiders. Chris is able to step up and help to eradicate these eight legged freaks and Arquette is perfect in his role in my opinion.  Scarlett Johansson is also in this film as Ashley Parker, the daughter of the sheriff, Samantha Parker, played by Kari Wuhrer. Kari also starred in 1997’s Anaconda, another giant animal film. All in all you can’t go wrong checking out Eight Legged Freaks, it’s a perfect mixture of tense and funny. The graphics of the spiders are a bit dated but it added to my enjoyment of the film. Grab some chocolate covered crickets, beer and get ready for a fun flick!

Eight Legged Freaks 1

Arquette as Chris McCormick

Eight Legged Freaks 2

Eight Legged Freaks 3

Scarlett Johansson as Ashley Parker

Eight Legged Freaks 4Eight Legged Freaks 5Eight Legged Freaks 6Eight Legged Freaks 8Eight Legged Freaks 9Eight Legged Freaks 10

Deck the Halls with Bau(tista)s of Holly: Final Score

Let’s face it the holiday season isn’t for everyone, even with all the bright colored lights, cheery music, and mass amounts of sweets, some just don’t like it. I didn’t always enjoy the holiday season myself. Well I’ll be doing something a bit different with this and maybe some future entries during these holiday weeks. I’ll be covering some non Christmas themed movies with maybe a small smattering of Christmas ones mixed in.


If you haven’t been able to tell from the title of this piece I’ll be reviewing a film starring someone who has become a bit of a juggernaut in Hollywood, Dave Bautista. Bautista, worked for many years in World Wrestling Entertainment and has had roles in films since around 2009. He’s been getting more and more opportunities since portraying Drax in Guardians of the Galaxy and becoming a part of the Marvel Cinematic Universe. This is great news for me because it means more movies to watch and enjoy.


In Final Score, Bautista plays a weary, and distant, U.S. Army member, Michael Knox, who visits a late army buddy’s family in England often. He has come to see his friend’s wife and her daughter Danni. He wants to take Danni to a football game between the West Hamm FC and Dynamo FC. Dynamo FC is from Russia, where as the beginning of the movie tells us the State of Sokovia has been in unrest since a failed revolution for independence seventeen years prior. This is especially interesting as Sokovia is a fictional country in the Marvel Cinematic Universe, which Bautista is a part of. A former Sokovian general, Arkady has come to the stadium to further his politics of the revolution. This includes rigging a large portion of the stadium to blow with c4 and offing a lot of security staff in an attempt to find his brother, believed by most to be dead. Unfortunately for Arkady, Knox is at the game and his niece, Danni is missing. This leads to Knox discovering that something is awfully wrong at the game.

Most of the characters we have seen Bautista  play on screen are stereotypical big muscle guy roles, which isn’t always a bad thing, in fact I think his physique helps his characters come to life. It is quite hard though to connect with an audience if all you have to offer, however,  is your physicality to roles. Thankfully for us, Bautista brings a lot of emotion to his role as Michael Knox, with his need to protect the daughter of a man he couldn’t protect when he should have been able to. Although it feels like he needs redemption, you can tell he also genuinely cares for Danni.


Final Score 1

Final Score 2

Bautista as Michael Knox and Lara Peake as Danni

final score 3

This movie has a lot of action, and some pretty great effects as well in it. Of special note in the film is a fight in a very small elevator, and an extended tussle in a kitchen. The kitchen encounter is probably my favorite as the effects really shine when a deep fryer comes into play. The villains, mostly two dimensional, are still unique enough to catch your attention, especially Vlad, played by Martyn Ford, and Tatiana, played by Alexandra Dinu. General Arkady is portrayed by one of my favorite actors since college, Ray Stevenson, if you’re not familiar with him I suggest checking out the horror movie Outpost, which is tons of fun and partly responsible for the slew of Nazi zombie far that flooded the market for a while. I’m pretty sure at the beginning of the movie when they show archival footage of Arkady it is actually a still from Outpost. I really enjoyed Final Score and if you’re looking to pad out your holiday viewing with some non holiday fare, I suggest checking out Final Score.

Final score 4

Final score 5

Martyn Ford as Vlad

Final score 7

Alexandra Dinu as Tatiana

Final score 8

Archival footage of Arkady as played by Ray Stevenson. Still is quite possibly from the film Outpost.

Lucha-Horror: Santo En La Venganza De La Momia Azteca

For the past few years I’ve participated in a little friendly competition called the Halloween Horror Movie Marathon Madness over on Facebook. Every year there is a theme and points are based on movie length and elements present in the movies. This year’s theme is Holiday horror movies and horror anthologies. Although I won’t be entirely writing about films in theme for my October posts, it wouldn’t quite feel right not mentioning it.

La Venganza poster.jpg

I’ve been interested in Mexican culture since I was about 5 years old. I started taking Spanish lessons when very young, however, I’m still not proficient at all in the language. In the early 2000’s I came across a lucha libre show on satellite television and I was wholly fascinated. It wasn’t until many years later that I got into wrestling and researched lucha libre more fully.  The 60’s saw an explosion in the popularity of lucha libre in Mexico and like most things that are popular they seep into other parts of culture and in this instance it was cinema. Santo was and still is an extremely well known luchador and he also happened to become a major force on screen. He was in a large handful of films before his death.

Santo En La Venganza De La Momia from 1971 is about a professor who commissions an expedition to find the tomb of an Aztec prince to recover treasure, among those hired for the expedition is Santo. The movie opens up with a lucha bout between Santo, his tag partner, Rebelde Rojo, and Gori Casanova, his tag partner Dik Angelo. I always enjoy the matches shown in the films that star luchadors. It could be some of the only footage of the golden era matches. Dik Angelo actually lost his mask against Santo in a Lucha De Apuesta (a fight with wager) in 1968.

Gori Casanova

Gori Casanova in yellow trunks, Santo in silver mask and tights

Rebelde Rojo y Dik

Dik Angelo red trunks and black singlet, Rebelde Rojo in red mask and tights, Santo in background

Santo y Rebelde.jpg

We cut to the professor’s office with Santo jaw jacking with the expedition team. It’s not long before they head out to find the treasure. After finding a guide, a grandfather, and his grandson Agapito (played by Santo’s son) they make their way through the jungle. They happen to come across a black panther and after a warning from Santo proceed on their way. Unfortunately, the panther was lying in wait and attacks Santo, who then wrestles the panther. It’s not a fake panther either, he literally is wrestling a panther. It’s a sight I was not prepared to see. They make it to the crypt and find the mummy which is actually a quite ghastly piece of effects. The guide warns of the curse of the Aztec prince and that he will return if his resting place is disturbed. That is what exactly happens too, the mummified prince returns to hunt down members of the expedition, including Agapito’s lovingly superstitious grandfather. There’s a twist in this film that I was not expecting but it doesn’t detract from the movie’s enjoyment. There is also another match in this movie where Santo fights Goliat Ayala.

Santo v Panther.jpg


Santo y Goliat.jpg

Goliat Ayala on right

If you’re a fan of lucha libre, genre films, Mexican pop culture, or any combination of the three, I recommend this film. Stay tuned for some more lucha-horror and other films starring wrestlers throughout the month.


On a side note I was able to go to a lucha libre show in Pittsburgh, Pa the past month. I met Shocker and Rey Bucanero there. You may know Shocker from Total Non Stop Action Wrestling or CMLL. I have been a fan of his since I started watching lucha and to meet him was wonderful! You can catch a replay of the event titled Lucha Fiesta on Fite Tv. Some of the stars that were on the show were Caristico (Sin Cara), Ultimo Dragon, Sam Adonis, and Joel Gertner (ECW)

Shocker and Rey Bucanero.jpg

Rey Bucanero, Me, Shocker

The Women’s Revolution Playing on a Screen Near You: The House of Him

This week sees the premiere of the 2nd World Wrestling Entertainment’s Mae Young Classic. It’s a tournament where 32 of the world’s premier female athletes compete to win the honor of being crowned the victor of the tournament. I have been a fan of wrestling for about 4 years; I’ve been following many of the amazing female talent who wrestle both on the independent circuits and in places like Impact Wrestling and World Wrestling Entertainment for just as long. I’ve decided to focus on the many kick ass ladies who have graced not only the squared circle but the silver screen as well for the next week or so.


I thought I’d kick off this feature with a film that I’m not certain many folks are aware of, The House of Him. The House of Him after debuting at the Glasgow Film Festival released on October 31, 2014 in both the United Kingdom and United States through the Vimeo Video on Demand service. The House of Him is about a misogynistic serial killer who targets women exclusively. He has invited a couple girls to his house for a wee bit of bullshit when something strange starts occurring in his home. Is a ghostly apocalypse descending on his neighborhood or has something even worse come to visit the film’s villain? The House of Him

The House of Him stars a few wrestlers from Glasgow based wrestling promotion Insane Championship Wrestling, namely Carmel Jacob, Jack Jester, and Isla Dawn. You may be familiar with Isla Dawn as she wrestled as Stacy Coates in a match against Asuka at a WWE Raw in Manchester, England and she is a participant in the upcoming UK Women’s tourney that WWE is putting on. Although Isla Dawn doesn’t have much of a screen presence in this film and features as a disembodied voice, it is still very much a must see. Carmel Jacob held the ICW Fierce Females title but retired from in ring competition in 2016. Jack Jester stills wrestles at ICW and is also a wrestling coach. If you haven’t heard of ICW I suggest you check them out for some fun wrestling. Some of their alumni are doing some pretty cool things in the wrestling world, both Kaylee Ray and Piper Niven were in the first Mae Young Classic and have continued to compete internationally. Although these wrestlers only make cursory appearances in The House of Him, the movie stands on its own with their minor. Isla Dawn’s sister Louise Stewart plays one of the two main roles in the film as Anna, Him’s latest victim. Her performance was great and I hope to see more from her in the future.

The House of Him is an independent film and is largely confined to one setting, Him’s house. I am simply amazed at what they were able to achieve with this film. It’s a taut, mysterious slasher film turned on its head and I highly recommend it to anyone interested in horror or films that star wrestlers no matter how minimal their roles may seem. This film is masterfully crafted and satisfactory from beginning to end. It may seem a little daunting for some folks as the Scottish English sometimes is a bit harder to understand for folks not familiar with it’s dialectical nuances. I sometimes have a hard time grasping at what is said in some films where it is used but this one isn’t too hard to handle. Honestly the less I say about this film the more you are bound to enjoy it. You can watch the film on Amazon Prime.

Jack Jester House of Him

Jack Jester

Carmel Jacob House of Him

Carmel Jacob

Louise Stewart House of Him

Louise Stewart

Isla Dawn

Isla Dawn

Gnash at the Beach- Junk Files: Piranha Sharks

It’s the end of Sharknado week. Sharknado: The Last One premieres tonight on Syfy and I’m winding down my features on sharks with a movie that I really enjoy. Piranha Sharks features cameos by Al Snow (ECW, WWE, TNA) and future wrestling personality Jose Canseco, a former major league baseball player, who recently signed with World Class Revolution Pro Wrestling.


Piranha Sharks poster.jpg

Piranha sharks is set during the holiday season where bio engineered sharks to be used as weapons are a total failure. They are too erratic and end up eating a lab technician from the inside out. A couple of jamokes suggest to the head of the company that they market them like sea monkeys. Naturally everything goes tits up when people start buying these pets since you know, “People love sharks.”


Piranha Sharks Logo.jpg

This movie is a blast to watch. The characters are likable and it really works as a fun slice of dark humor centered around miniature freaking sharks. The exterminators that are the main focus of the film have some really fun dialogue with each other and you really do care about their lives. Kevin Sorbo plays the constantly pantsless mayor of Manhattan. Al Snow plays the creator of piranha sharks, an anthrophobe, who is scared to death of people. For someone with so few lines, he surely adds to the film, with his spastic outbursts and petting of plants. Jose Canseco plays himself, he is a spokesperson for piranha sharks. They are his babies and they saved his marriage. The CGI isn’t horrible and the practical effects of the piranha sharks when they are dissected and used in closeups are great. I really like the look of them. Although not super heavy on the gore when the mayhem begins it doesn’t let up very often. This is a fun movie that I’m sure most people who love B-Movies will enjoy. It’s a step above most of the stuff you see on SyFy. Unfortunately it never had a DVD release in the United States as far as I know. There is a German DVD with the actual title of Piranha Sharks and a release from the United Kingdom under the title Jurassic Piranha. It is available to stream on Amazon Video if you want to watch it. I definitely recommend this film. Piranha Shark

Al Snow Dr. Parson

Al Snow as Dr. Parsons

Parsons Background

Jose Canseco

Jose Canseco in deep contemplative thought about his beloved piranha sharks

Gnash at the Beach: Mako Jaws of Death

We’re throwing it back today to 1976 with Mako Jaws of Death. Mako stars Harold Sakata most known as Odd Job from the Bond movie Goldfinger. Harold was also a professional wrestler from 1950-1975 billed under the name of Tosh Togo. The native Hawaiian  played a part in bringing professional wrestling to Japan after the second world war.


Mako Jaws

Mako Jaws of Death is quite the odd movie, it’s a shark attack movie in a different vein than most of the public is used to. It is about a loner named Sonny Stein who has a deep connection with sharks. Sonny loves sharks, he goes after everyone who mistreats sharks by attacking them and throwing them to the sharks. A strange medallion he wears around his neck was given to him by a priest of the shark god after he escapes through a Filipino inlet while doing salvage in the south seas. Mako moves slowly, sometimes even painfully slow but I enjoyed it. In the movie the sharks are sympathetic instead of being a menace terrorizing anyone who dares enter the water. Man is mistreating sharks and Sonny Stein armed with his medallion is here to avenge the wrong doings against shark kind.


Harold Sakata plays Pete in the movie, a drunken shark hunter. Pete along with his friend, Charlie torment Stein every chance they get. Harold does a fine job playing the physically imposing shark hunter and though his lines are hard to understand in the film, his body language and physicality are top notch in the film. There are a few other unsavory characters in the film including a scientist, a bar owner, and his wife. Stein seems to be just misunderstood at first but we see that he is deeply disturbed throughout the movie. The movie as a whole although not an action packed film is still satisfying. A man with a psychic connection to sharks is an interesting and original premise for a film and it didn’t disappoint me.

If you’re a fan of 70’s movies, shark movies, or oddities this is a film for you. If you don’t go in expecting something along the lines of more modern shark attack movies you may really enjoy it. The film is also unique in that it doesn’t employ animatronic sharks but instead uses real sharks who are actually in the water with actors at times. It’s worth a view for that alone. Check it out not only for the late Sakata’s performance of Pete but also the novelty of real sharks being showcased and filmed.

Harold Sakata

Left: Harold Sakata as Pete

SakataHaroldHarold revelrySakata RifleSakata boat

Gnash at the Beach: Shark Exorcist

If you’re picking up a movie called Shark Exorcist, you pretty much know what you’re in for. You’re not here for high brow entertainment, you’re down in the gutter, ready for a good time with the expectation to be asking yourself, “What the hell?”. That’s exactly what you’ll get watching Donald Farmer’s crazier than a bed bug movie Shark Exorcist.


Shark Exorcist is about a lake in Tennesse plagued by a demonic shark, summoned by a satanic nun. It attacks a girl visiting with her friends and all hell breaks loose. Shark Exorcist stars Roni Jonah, an OVW alumni and at one point the Miz’ onscreen girl friend. Roni Jonah wrestled for a short time but has made a splash in her acting roles. She is in the upcoming movie Powerbomb which I have written about in prior posts. I can’t wait for that film. Roni plays a paranormal investigator, Nancy Chase who is on a tv show called Ghost Whackers. She is on scene at the lake to communicate with the spirits of the victims of the shark attack but in doing so she is possessed by the demon shark. Although she is not the central focus of the film, the focus being the group of friends who visit the lake, namely Ali the girl attacked and possessed, she certainly brings the movie a bit of comedic relief and brightness. Shark Exorcist is largely a mess but boy, what a mess it is! It will certainly not be everyone’s cup of tea but I enjoyed it for what it was. The exorcism parts with a priest played by Bobby Kerecz who also portrays his brother in the film seem like a different movie but it still works. I would have liked for it to be more seamlessly integrated into the film and have a more prominent role than it ends up having, however. Apart from the low quality of the demon shark and the way the actors portray being dragged under by it, the effects are good. It’s largely lots of blood and vomit but there is also a toothy bit of makeup later in the film. The movie is pretty short at 70 or so minutes but 20 minutes of it is what appears to be an extended shoe horned after credit scene. If you like bottom of the barrel straight to video fare I hope you get the chance to see this. It’s no masterpiece but it satisfied me as a viewer. Be sure to follow Roni Jonah on twitter to keep up with her upcoming roles and grab a few brews, take a couple shots and sit down to experience Shark Exorcist, it’s gonna be one hell of a time.

Ghost Whackers Shark ExorcistRoni Jonah Shark exorcistnancy-chase-shark-exorcist.jpgCommunicating with the spiritsNancy Chase possessedA DEMONJonah SharkPossessed Nancy